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stressful1, Male, 56, USA, Martinsburg, WV

I am almost 44 years of age. I met my wife at the age of 15. We fell in love at first site. We dated for 7 years, planned our life and did it. We had our first son after the first 4 years of marrage and a second son after the next 4 years. I started work with a very successful company 5 month before my wedding. I met a very beautiful woman that worked for that company, and we became best friends. She was married 1 year after me. Her husband and I became good friends. He worked for the same firm. As the years went by, 18 to be exact, we became closer friends, but never crossed the line. Her Husband became an associate of the company and later left to become a very powerful man in the business community.
After 18 years of driving 70 miles one way to my office, the company opened an office close to my home. I moved to the new office. My friend and I couldn't handle the seperation. We always talked and had lunch or whatever, never once crossing the line. She came to visit my new office we went to lunch a few times. She drove over an hour just to go to lunch so we could hang out. We finally admitted that we were in love. We started a heated affair that has lasted over 4 years. Because of not being able to be together, we met for lunch everyday, which cost me my job. She told her husband, who actually had bad blood with our old company, and he got me a new job. My relationship with him got me the job. All I have to do at my new job, is take him to lunch once and awhile and keep him happy; keep him as a client. Major conflict of interest.
She is now filed for divorse and wants me to do the same. My wife found out about the affair, but will not let go. My wife wants me to stay. She is threatening to call her husband, which will blackball me in my industry, and my boss.
My wife and I have been together almost 29 years now. I love her as much as I love the other. I could be happy with either one, but I can't hurt the other. Both women keep making love to me to try and persuade me with them. I tried to leave my wife, but just couldn't do it. My sons are 14 and 18. They still need me, but I need the other woman more than anything. There is a little difference in our age. She is 53 and I'm 44. My wife is 45. My wife and I make a good living but are fall from well off. we just get by week to week. My oldest son is ready for college. The other woman is very welthy. She owns her own home and has 500,000 plus in the bank. I want to be with the other woman but, wouldn't be happy leaving my family with nothing. I still owe 100,000 on my home. I don't know what to do.

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Comments By Other Users

lostlamb, Female, 36, Malaysia, Kuala Lumpur 29-4-2008
totally agree with 2958. a great woman has given you 29 of her best years. given you a wonderful home, dealt with your nonsense, hasnt given you the boot despite your affair and in fact still loves you after all the nonsense you put her through. and for what? a rich older woman who just wants you to be her bitch? trust me, she doesnt seem like it now. but mark my words, you will join her husband's club of has-beens. stop being a jerk, stop running from your financial troubles, stop being a whiny baby, pull yourself together and remember that what you do now will set an example for your kids and WILL DETERMINE whether or not they make it good in life, and that includes understanding what love and marriage is about, what sacrifice is about, and what being a man is all about.

Dainagirl24, Female, 37, USA, Waycross 30-3-2008
jus get the wealthy g/f 2 payoff ur debts n then b there 4 ur sons,i'd try throwin round idea of a stayin with both women n the same house. i guarantee if they both luv u they'll consider it.

2958, Male, 36, USA, Monroe, OH 20-3-2008
Nothing you do is going to be painless here. You need to honor what you committed yourself to when you married your wife. If you continue to try and look out for number one, your going to bring down everyone involved. Be a man, leave your mistress, be faithful to your wife and sons, whatever happens negatively after that you'll just have to deal with.

mentiroso, Male, 43, USA, Redlands 26-2-2008
Can you convince both women to share and get them to a threesome. They may like the idea so you do not have to choose. Look at all the things you can enjoy together instead of what you will lose.

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